Thursday, April 11, 2013

Doogie Howser's Got Nothing On You

Crazy pill count:
AM 30 Cymbalta, 10 Adderall, 1 Ativan, 5 Zyprexa, 200 Lamictal
afternoon .5 Ativan, 5 Adderall
PM .5 Ativan, 5 Zyprexa, 200 Lamictal, 25 Topomax

When I see stuff like this it makes me want to punch someone in the face. When depressed, which I have been so much lately, I get so sick and tired of people telling me to "try harder."

"Just get out of the house and you'll feel better."
"Meet up with some friends, that will cheer you up."

But it's just not that easy. Depression isn't a case of needing to be cheered up. It's a case of messed of neurotransmitters and a bit of bad luck when it came to the spin of the genetic wheel.

No, genetic wheel...not hamster wheel!

But then again, I haven't actually tried to just stop being sad and start being awesome instead. Maybe Doogie Howser has a point. Maybe that is the secret...just be awesome.

Perhaps I'll give it a try.
I mean why the heck not?
It seems a little silly that I've tried twenty-five different crazy pills, but haven't just tried to be awesome. Maybe you can give it a try too and tell me how it goes.

And if it doesn't work...
You are loved just the same. 

And truthfully, you already are awesome, even when you are lost in the dark.
And that is only temporary. Pretty soon you'll be back to feeling as awesome as you are. Deep in my heart, I know how hard that waiting to feel better can be.

But you will.
I promise.
And until then, take comfort in knowing you are way more awesome than Doogie Howser.

then OR now

Until next time...


  1. lol...the last thing on this post made me laugh. You know, when I first saw that on Pinterest, I loved it! I think because I was either manic or in the middle. At those times, it's like F*** yeah!

    But when I'm depressed and facing the reality of depression, that kind of stuff really pisses me off. If I COULD just be awesome, wouldn't I DO that? Of course I would. Who enjoys being depressed?

    Not me. Not anyone.

    Love you, bacon! you are awesome and loved regardless of what mood you're in.

    1. Thanks, Grace. YOU are awesome! Big awesome hug!

  2. Just, be. If we never meet again, I still love you.

  3. xo. Anita

  4. Getting out of the house ect.. is all very well, but is near impossible if your in the worst of the episode! Why can't people(besides patients and their families) understand that a)stabilization has to come first & b) It's not a fast process....?
    Keep being awesome! :)

    1. YOU keep being awesome! ;)